Check out Part 1 here.

You’ve already realized that dating your friends’ exes comes with its own complications. But dating your exes’ friends isn’t any easier. High school can be a bubble that’s hard to break out of. This means branching out romantically might not always be a viable option. But once you start pursuing multiple people from a friend group you’re laying the foundation for awkward times in the near future. This decision will put a stress on your relationship, the whole social circle, and especially on your boyfriend’s or girlfriend’s friendship. So before you swap partners like you’re learning to square dance think about the consequences.

As the saying goes: you can pick your friends, you can pick your nose, but you can’t pick your friend’s nose. Nor can you pick your friend’s ex as your new boyfriend or girlfriend. Sure, no one can officially tell you who to and who not to date. We all try to take the advice from our friends, respect the wishes of our parents, and listen to our instincts, but figuring out who is the right fit for us romantically is a trial-and-error process each time. If you find yourself on the verge of dating the ex of one of your friends, it’s time to think rethink. Maybe the pros and cons of seeing someone your friend used to date can help you decide. 

After recently watching VH1’s Top 100 Best Songs of the 2000’s, with Beyonce and Jay-Z winning the #1 best song with Crazy In Love, it got me thinking about love. Love is such a complex word, and everyone seems to have their own definition, but a truth that seems universal is that everyone wants this “love,” the closest thing we seem to have to magic.

Before I give my comparison between relationships in two completely different places, I will first explain what summer camp is.  Many kids, “tweens,” and teenagers go to a variety of summer sleepaway/overnight camps to enjoy a variety of sports, activities, as well as hang with friends.  The three sleepaway/overnight camps I’ve experienced, all were coed and were basically confined on a huge piece of property in rural areas.  Being confined in such areas from a few weeks to two months drastically impacts relationships.

Struggling with whether or not to de-friend your ex?  If you can check off ANY of the following boxes then I’d say yes.    

If one of your friends was angry with you would you rather they go tell everyone about it or would you rather them come straight to you? The answer is pretty simple, right? Practically anyone would rather that their friends talk to them directly than talk about it with anyone else. Why then I wonder does the answer to that question seem more complicated when talking about Facebook or Twitter? 

Awhile back, when you met someone you liked, you’d ask for their number and call them later on. You’d actually have to speak to them. Chilling right? Today when we read “<3 luv u” from the person we like, our knees buckle, and we’re lost for words. Back in the day, our hearts would melt if someone received a love note, talked for long hours over the phone, or if he simply came up to talk to you in the hallway. Nowadays, Facebook and text messaging are considered our love notes and long conversations. All of a sudden, we’re checking our cell phones every other minute for texts or logging on Facebook to look for wall messages. No one said dating was easy, but dating with technology is complicated.

Rejection: it hurts. No one likes hearing the word “no” come out of anyone’s mouth, especially from a boyfriend or girlfriend. But those two letters could be the reason you don’t become pregnant or contract an STI. No matter how hard or uncomfortable it is, we need to know it’s okay to say no to sex. Teens must think twice before having sex, because once it’s done, there is no going back.

I do agree that guys and girls are expected to behave differently in a relationship. I feel that in relationships girls are expected to be kind, emotional, and lenient. They are expected to “ride or die” for their boyfriends no matter what. Guys are expected to be brave, protective, the provider, and the one in charge in the relationship. If a guy cheats, his girlfriend is expected to forgive and forget and stick with him. Whether you decide to live up to the double standard or not, it is difficult especially when you are involved in a relationship.