Ask Us Anything
Plastic wrap as condoms…douching with Coke…sex myths can get pretty crazy. Trying to separate fact from fiction? Ask Us Anything about sex myths…Along with our partners at East Los High, we want to know what you’re curious about and what you’re hearing. Post your questions by midnight ET on Thursday; we'll have answers for you around noon ET on Friday.
Can I still get pregnant if we did it in the pool?
Yep! Where you are doesn’t really matter—any time that you have sex, especially if it’s unprotected, there’s a chance of pregnancy. Having sex underwater doesn’t flush out or kill the sperm, so it’s always a good idea to use protection! Check out our Birth Control Explorer to see all of the birth control methods that are available to you.I find this helpful
My boyfriend is doing drugs lately, is that going to change our sex life ?
You didn’t say what type of drugs your boyfriend is using, but anytime someone is using something that alters their mood, it will change all of their behavior—including their sex life. One other important thing to note is that it’s false that drugs like marijuana will lower sperm count—don’t let your boyfriend convince you to have unprotected sex because he thinks he’s not fertile anymore. .
If you’re worried about your boyfriend’s drug use, reach out to a trusted adult or check out the resources at AbovetheInfluence.Com.
Can a girl get pregnant if she has sex on her period?
Yes! Any time that you have sex, especially if it’s unprotected sex, there is a chance of pregnancy—even if the girl is on her period. Because sperm can live in the vagina for up to seven days, they can survive until the girl is off her period and fertile again, which can result in a pregnancy. It’s always important to use protection, no matter where you’re having sex or if the girl is on her period. Try our Birth Control Explorer to see what methods of birth control are available.I find this helpful
Is it true that STDs will stick with you forever?
Many STDs are curable with antibiotics and leave minimal if any lasting effects. Others, like herpes and HIV, are not curable, but even these are treatable with medication. If you think that you or your partner might have an STD, it’s important that you talk to a health care professional to get an accurate diagnosis and some guidance going forward. Need help finding a doctor? Check out our clinic locator.I find this helpful
Is it true you can get pregnant through pre-cum?
Yes, you can get pregnant from pre-cum. Although pre-cum is usually just a natural lubricant, there is definitely a chance that it can contain sperm, especially if the guy has recently ejaculated (either from sex or masturbation). Besides that, pre-cum can carry sexually transmitted diseases, like HIV. Using birth control any time you have sex—whether that’s a condom, the pill, or something else—is super important, because couples who regularly have sex but don’t use protection have an 85% chance of getting pregnant within a year.I find this helpful
If you pee right after sex, does that kill the sperm?
Peeing after sex does not kill sperm or flush it out! Your best bet for preventing pregnancy is using some form of birth control; to see all of the methods available to you, take a look at our Birth Control Explorer.I find this helpful
I’ve heard that guys think about sex constantly—like, ALL the time. Is that true?
While many guys do think about sex a lot, the old myth that guys think about sex every seven seconds doesn’t have any scientific basis. Everyone is different, so some guys (and girls!) may think about sex more than others, but guys don’t only think about having sex.I find this helpful
Does sex really hurt the first time?
Sex shouldn’t really hurt the first time but a little bit of discomfort is normal. That being said, everyone is different and everyone’s definition of “pain” is different so you may consider your first time painful whereas someone else would say their first time didn’t hurt at all. One thing that can make sex more uncomfortable is nerves; when you’re nervous, that can cause you to clench up your muscles. So it’s important to be relaxed and ready for sex—and protected with the right method(s) of birth control-- before you decide to have sex.
Sex is a big step in a relationship, and if you’re not both completely ready, waiting might be a good idea. Protection is essential if you’re deciding to have sex, and can go a long way toward making you feel more comfortable about the choice. If you’re feeling nervous about sex, have a conversation with your partner about your expectations, and check out our Birth Control Explorer to see all of the birth control methods that are available to you.
Is there such thing as too much sex? If so, please explain.
There isn’t such thing as too much sex because everyone is different. The most important thing is that you and your partner are on the same page about sex—when to have it and how often to have it. Relationships shouldn’t be solely based on sex, and both you and your partner need to consent to sex every time that you have it. In that way, one party can feel that there’s too much sex—people just have different preferences when it comes to how much you’re doing it, so it’s really important to communicate with your partner about your thoughts and feelings.
Also—sex shouldn’t hurt, so if you’re in pain after having sex or if having sex is interfering with your daily activities, you might want to think about taking it a slower. If you’re worried about any discomfort that you’re feeling, check in with your doctor to figure out what’s going on.
If you're using a condom, do you also need to take other forms of birth control?
When it comes to birth control, using two forms is better than one! Using a condom is a great way of preventing STDs and pregnancy, but you and your partner can decrease the chance of pregnancy even more if you use a condom along with another form of birth control. To check out all of your birth control options, take a look at our Birth Control Explorer or have a chat with your doctor to see which method would be best for you!I find this helpful
Are condoms the only form of protection against STDs?
Yes. Although other methods of birth control can prevent pregnancy, barrier methods like the male and female condom are the only way to prevent STDs. For a greater chance of preventing pregnancy, it’s a good idea to double up condoms with another form of birth control. If you want to see all of the birth control options available to you, check out our Birth Control Explorer!I find this helpful
Are there forms of birth control that don't involve pills or reapplications or condoms (i.e. a more lasting form)?
Yes! In fact, long acting contraceptives are the most effective methods of reversible birth control because there’s no danger of missing a pill or forgetting to put on a new patch. Methods of this kind of contraception include several types of IUDs, which last for three to 12 years depending on which on you get, the implant, which lasts for up to three years, and the shot, which lasts for three months.
If you’re interested in long acting birth control, your health care provider is the best person to help you figure out what will work best for you but you can learn more about any of the forms of birth control through our Birth Control Explorer!
if he used a condom and pulled out, can i still get pregnant?
Any time that you have sex you run the risk of getting pregnant, but using a condom and pulling out does decrease your chances. If you’ve missed a period or are worried about getting pregnant, you might want to talk to a doctor, who can administer a pregnancy test. If you need help finding a doctor, try our Clinic Locator.
Does having sex with the same gender (girl/girl) mean you lost your virginity or does it have to be with a guy to be consider not a virgin?
Virginity can be hard to define, because sex is really about an emotional connection. So no, sex definitely doesn’t have to be with a guy to be considered a loss of virginity, and is no less real if it’s between a girl and guy, two girls, or two guys. It can be complicated to define virginity, and some people don’t care to define it at all. It’s much more important that you feel safe and comfortable in all of your sexual encounters than you adhere to a strict definition of what sex is.
How you define sex is personal—once you figure out what sex means to you, you can say for yourself whether or not you’re a virgin.I find this helpful
Is it normal for a woman's hymen to break or tear when she loses her virginity? I've heard mixed answers.
A woman’s hymen can tear when she has sex—but it can also tear from using a tampon or riding a bike! If a woman is relaxed during sex, there’s a chance that her hymen won’t tear even if it is intact. The hymen is just a part of a woman’s body, and everyone is different, so a woman’s hymen may have already torn by the time she has sex, or it still may be partially intact and could tear at that point. Many people associate the hymen with virginity, but because there are so many ways that the hymen can tear outside of sex, it’s not a reliable way of telling if someone is a virgin.I find this helpful
Does semen die when it hits oxygen?
Not immediately—but it does die when it gets dried out, which can happen pretty quickly if it’s on a dry surface out in the air. However, if the sperm is in a warm environment (like a woman’s body), it can survive for several days, and could cause a pregnancy.I find this helpful
Do you have to be 18 or have a parent with you to get birth control pills?
Minors can usually get hormonal birth control (like the pill) without parental consent, but every state makes their own laws about this. When you call the doctor to make an appointment, make sure that you let them know how old you are and ask whether or not they guarantee confidentiality if you don’t want to tell your parents about wanting birth control. Keep in mind—even though talking to your parents about sex or birth control can be really awkward, they were once your age and might have some really helpful insight into your situation, so you might want to consider talking with your parents about birth control, but that’s totally up to you!
If you need help finding a doctor, check out our Clinic Locator, and if you’re curious about the other forms of birth control that are available to you, take a look at our Birth Control Explorer.
If you have sex without a condom, but you're on birth control, can you still get pregnant?
If you have sex without a condom, your risk of pregnancy varies depending on what kind of birth control you’re using. Any time that you have sex, there’s a risk of pregnancy, but there’s a difference in how effective different methods are. For example, the pill is 91% effective, versus an IUD, which can be up to 99% effective at preventing pregnancy. It’s awesome that you’re using birth control, and it will significantly lower your risk of an unexpected pregnancy! It’s always a good idea to double up by using condoms with another form of birth control for the added protection. Plus, condoms are also the only form of birth control (besides abstinence) that protects against STIs!I find this helpful
Can you get pregnant your first time of unprotected sex?
Absolutely, especially if it’s unprotected sex. All sex is created equal, so it doesn’t matter if it’s your first time or 31st time—you still have the same chance of getting pregnant, that’s why it’s super important to use protection. To understand all of the birth control options available to you, check out our Birth Control Explorer, or ask your doctor.I find this helpful
Which positions are most and least likely to cause pregnancy?
If you’re having sex, it doesn’t matter which position you’re in, there’s a risk of the girl becoming pregnant. That’s why it’s super important to use protection, whether it’s a condom, or a form of hormonal birth control, like the pill or the patch. Also, you don’t have to stick to just one method! Using a condom and a form of hormonal birth control can greatly reduce the risk of an unplanned pregnancy. Plus, the condom is the only form of birth control (besides abstinence) that protects against STIs. To see all of the birth control options that are available to you, check out our Birth Control Explorer.I find this helpful
Is it true that if you have sex while on your period than you can't get pregnant?
Nope! Any time that you have sex, especially if it’s unprotected sex, there’s a risk of pregnancy. If doesn’t matter if you’re underwater, on your period, or planning to do jumping jacks afterward—you can still get pregnant. Sperm can live in the vagina for up to seven days, so there’s a possibility that they will survive until the girl is off her period and fertile again, which could result in a pregnancy. Whether you’re on your period or not, it’s always really important to use protection when you’re having sex. To see all of the options available to you, check out our Birth Control Explorer!I find this helpful